4

Graduation!

As most of you know, I finally graduated college. WOOHOO! It was a very exciting, fun filled weekend. There were a lot of pictures and somewhat a lot to say so I decided to break it up into two posts. This first one will cover graduation day and in a couple days I will post another that will cover my last day in Utah.



Wow, what a day! It was a little hectic, as I am sure it is for everyone that goes through it. After going to bed at 3:30 AM the night before, I have to wake up at 6:00 AM to be ready in time to get to the school at 7 to check in. Needless to say, I was completely tired most of the day, but the excitement kept me chipper. Pretty much my entire immediate family came. My dad and stepmom, mom and stepdad, grandma and grandpa, great-grandmother, and great-aunt all came to Utah to celebrate and watch me graduate. I thought it was pretty cool and really appreciated everyone making the trip out. Here is a picture of my dad and I at around 7:15 AM before the ceremony.

Here is me, my mom, and my dad after graduation. How excited am I at this moment? haha.


Me with (left to right): Margie, Nana, Grandma, Grandpa.


Me and Nana. She is 96 and she made it all the way from California. What a trooper! I love her and I am so glad she was healthy enough to make it.


The night of graduation we all went out to eat at Macaroni Grill. I worked there so it was easy to get the reservation. Laura is a good friend of mine and she ended up being our server which was fun. I think this is her token Japanese pose. She is only missing her camera and hawaiian shirt.


Here I am, happy as a clam at dinner.

All in all it was a great day, but very tiring. I am glad I ended up walking rather that just coming home after finals. I'll be back in a few days with more pictures and stuff. Enjoy for now.

Enjoy this song by my good friend Cory Mon called Touch of Grace.



2

Don't mess with me...I'm chillin'...



One of the very quotable lines from the worst movie I have ever seen. Another great FF (fun fact) about this movie is that my good friend and roommate Jeff Stone is the star. Thats right Ladies and Gents. Jeff Stone did star in a D grade movie in the late nineties with the guy from Michael Clayton (a recent oscar nominee, the movie not the actor) and the girl that plays the chiefs wife in Dances with Wolves. Two bona-fide actors in one horrible movie. I still don't know what the plot line was. The significance of this event is that I have been bugging Old Man Bones to let me watch it pretty much since I moved in. He denied me over and over again, too embarrassed to let me watch it. I even threatened to buy the movie online and watch but it really didn't budge him. After giving up, finally, to my dismay, he offered to show it to me as a going away present. In hindsight I don't know if it was actually a present or punishment. Haha. Truly the worst movie I have ever seen. Which is actually weird to think about. I would rather be in a movie that takes the cake for the worst movie ever than a movie that people watch and go, "Eh, it was ok,". Because it was so bad, we all got some laughs out of it. I have to publicly thank Stone Bone for letting me watch it. I am now in a rare, distinguished group of people who have seen "In Jest" and to that I am thankful. A friend couldn't ask for a better going away present. So thank you again Jeff. To end this post I would like to quote another great line from this movie. "You think your ass is ice cream and everybody wants a lick. You're wrong." Pure genius.



4

A Day in Scotland

Yesterday Donnie, Erin, and I took an adventure and went to the beaches of Scotland. At least that is what the pictures looked like. It was actually Utah Lake but we decided that it looked a lot more like Scotland, largely due to the weather. The it looks like its really cold, but it was actually fairly warm, but pretty windy.

Some of these pictures are pretty random but I thought they looked cool.


Here is Erin and Donnie. You can see Snubbs in the background on the left.



Yours Truly.

There was this random house like structure with a couple other cinder block buildings that were destroyed. It was really weird.

Erin and I. Word.




Ok, this is a video that we took on the way of this awesome kid riding a unicycle. We thought that is was by far the best thing ever. It really made the day. I hope you all enjoy it as much as we did.

This song is by Portishead and its called Mysterons. They fantabulous and I like them. Enjoy.



2

Here we go.....


It's been a little while, about a week, since I have last wrote. In that time the new Thrice album, The Alchemy Index Volumes 3 & 4, has leaked on the internet for my downloading pleasure. I'm actually pretty impressed that it took so long to leak seeing that it comes out in stores this Tuesday the 15th. Needless to say this album is amazing to me. I have no doubt explained this project to most of you reading this blog but for the rest you it is basically a 4-disc undertaking with each disc having 6 songs that are themed lyrically and sonically to the four classic elements (fire, water, air, earth). To loosely describe them, fire is heavier, water is electronic sounding with a lot of keyboards and drum machines but very soothing and chill, earth is rootsy, gospel and blues sounding with lots of acoustic guitar, banjo, percussion, and piano, and air is very hard to explain but to make it easy I will describe it as soft rock.

So the earth and air portions come out this Tuesday and is what I have been listening to all week. Since Fire and Water came out last October I have fully digested them and can now somewhat appreciate the entire album with all 4 discs as a whole. I would really suggest this album (Vol. 3 and 4) to anyone. They are so good and accessible that I think anyone from my mom and dad to friends would like them. The cd comes out this Tuesday once again so I exhort you all to check it out.

I am starting to actually believe summer is close due to a couple of reasons. Reason #1: I went longboarding down Provo Canyon with my good friend/roommate/gracious and understanding landlord Justin today for the first time in 2008. WOOHOO! So much fun! It was like 70 degrees or so today. So pretty and nice outside. I'll tell you what, there is nothing like driving with your windows down. Those of you in California or Puerto Rico may not appreciate this as much, but for me here in Utah the last 5 months have been hell for me with this winter being the coldest winter in Utah in years (thats actually a fact not just me being a pansy). Reason #2: I am starting to prepare to move back to California. Not really a sign of the times but you all get my excitement I'm sure. I look forward to many bon fires and days at the beach this summer.

I was informed this week that I probably have a lot more readers than I thought I did. My sister Katie informed me that my Grandma and Grandpa, Aunt Margie, and my lovely Nana might be reading, not to mention countless other that stumble upon my page and are enthralled with the shenanigans and ridiculousness that I call my life. To these and others I say Hello and Welcome. Just to worn a few of you I partly created this blog to act as a journal and a way to get some things off of my chest. I try to keep it PG for the most part and create a way for everyone to enjoy a window into my life and more importantly my thoughts. That being said, every once in a while I may tend to get a tad bit racy and edgy. It is not my objective to offend anyone, although I am sure I do it on a daily basis. Its more of a way to get my thoughts out and sometimes, yes, those thoughts are negative and somewhat offensive. So.....sorry....but it will happen here and there. Please don't judge me. Haha.

The song playing right now is off of the new Thrice cd and is called "A Song For Milly Michaelson". Its off of the air disc. Enjoy it as much as I do.



3

I am ManBoy!

This delicious morsel that you are viewing was dinner. Yes you are seeing correctly. Mac 'n Cheese topped with filet mignon. I am ManBoy! I had the idea and presented it to Old Man Bones. He replied, "Please bless...". And so it was....the results are in and it was PHENOMENAL!!! With my recent Body for Life expedition, I haven't tasted of the Mac and Cheese for a while. So since i just finished the 3 month program, i had somewhat of a week off. It was not a good week, haha. I went to the gym once and ate like crap all week. So that being behind me, I will start this week and the next three month period with a bang. This beautiful creation was that bang. Now its back to healthiness and frequenting the gym. For those of you who enjoy Mac and Cheese I implore you to take this venture and meet me in heaven.



4

Driving school 101

I seriously want to know where some people learn to drive. How can some people be so bad at one thing? The amount of people here in Orem/Provo that can't drive is seriously beyond my belief. Driving is not that difficult. Usually it involves pressing on one of two pedals and steering a wheel that is in front of you. Most importantly though, it involves paying a small amount of attention to what is going on around you. #1 on that list is freakin speed limit. 35 mph does not mean 25 mph or 30 mph. I would even venture to say that it doesn't mean 35 mph. A 35 mph sign is really a minimum speed limit, not the maximum. Also, has anyone here ever heard of a turning signal? When you change lanes or turn please use them. If you are too lazy to move you fingers 3 inches, then you suck at life. Honestly. Its a common courtesy. Which leads me to my next point. For those who can't chew gum and walk at the same time, please don't talk on your cell phone and drive at the same time. I'm sorry Dad, this includes you. I think your wife would agree. Haha. But really, some people should just not be allowed to drive and talk on a cell phone at the same time. Its seems as though every time I am behind some a-hole driving 10 miles below the speed limit, i pass them and of course they are on a phone. Its usually some dumb soccer mom in her Tahoe or minivan. I want to throw things at their car.

Last but not least, here is a list of drivers that piss me off. Read carefully, you could be one of them...

The Grandpa - This guy can barely see over the steering wheel and is usually driving a car made in the 1970's that is made by either Buick, Cadillac, or Lincoln. Not only should this guy not be driving, he probably shouldn't be out on his own. If you need a walker to get from your house to your car, you are too old to drive. Also included in this category is the old grandma.
Chosen sticker: Mitt Romeny 2008 campaign sticker. Or maybe even worse, a W '04 sticker.

The Teenager - This idiot is usually seen around town in a Honda Civic that is a few years old. His car has a loud system that sounds like crap and usually some lame rims that don't look good. He is frequently witnessed not using his blinkers and cutting people off. I want to punch him in the face.
Chosen sticker: Some dumb oversized sticker of a company that you have never heard of like
ANON that takes up the entire rear window.

The Soccer Mom - As previously stated, she is usually on a phone with a car full of kids. Since its Utah, she is probably grossly over weight and driving a large SUV or minivan.
Chosen sticker: Either the stick figure family of them and their kids, a stupid mormon sticker
like RULDS2 or RWH, or both.


The Hispanic - Now I were in California I would rant about how slow asians drive but there aren't really many up here in Utah. They are replaced by the Hispanic. Usually driving a dilapidated economy car from the 80's or an Astro van. They love the Astro van for some reason. This category drives extremely slow, probably more than any other. I don't know if its because there aren't many cars in Mexico or if the speed limits are lower there or what. But its terrible and I hate being behind them.
Chosen sticker: Whatever crappy,cracked, half-falling sticker was on the car when they
bought it. If they do add there own sticker its usually something with the Mexican flag or
with the virgin Mary.

These are only a few of the bad drivers. Also keep an eye out for The Bro who drives a raised truck and apparently owns the road and The Woman who thinks putting on makeup is more important that staying in the boundaries of that thing we all like to a lane. Thank you for listening to this rant.



2

The Legend of the Playoff Beard

I really don't like April fools. I never have. I can never come up with anything believable. Furthermore, I'm usually duped because I forget its April 1st. I remember being in like 1st or 2nd grade and having my Dad tell my sister that he sold the Cricket, our pony, earlier in the day. I don't remember the whole thing exactly but I think I was in on it. I honestly don't even remember if she bought it or not. But I look back on that now and think, "How cruel?" Sorry Dad, I know you are reading this. But what if my sister did buy it? I just don't get much pleasure out of tricking people like that. I'm going to give you guys a little "i.e.", a "for example" if you will. Despite my dislike for April fools I decided I would try to trick my roommate Jeff earlier. In a nutshell I told him our other roommate Donnie was getting kicked out. It actually worked and Jeff believed it. After I had him hook, line, and sinker, I got bored and genuinely felt bad that I had tricked him. So I cut the line and told him "April fools". I can honestly say I got pretty much zero satisfaction out of it. I think its funny that even though much of our day to day life is full of little white lies or mild exaggerations, someone felt the need to start April fools, an entire day designed to lie to people. Thats like setting up a national holiday called "Con man's Day" to celebrate the great con men of history. I digress...

Speaking of criminals, a week back my friend Mitch was begging me to grow the "playoff beard" after posting the pictures from the BBQ and seeing my gross facial hair. The story of the "playoff beard" dates back to the summer of 2006 when I sold satellite dishes door-to-door with Mitch in Oregon. Yes, i know, it was the worst job of my life. More important was the playoff beard I grew while seeing some success. Mitch and I had been going to the ghetto part of Portland to sell. That fateful day Mitch had been making fun of me for a few reasons. I had been wearing a XXL shirt because for some reason the office only had one XL. So I'm wearing this absolutely huge, baggy shirt and all my ankle socks were dirty so I wore my other socks that went halfway up to calves. On top of that I had a growth of about a week and a half due to laziness. As you can see in the pictures provided here and in my BBQ post, my facial hair is gross and makes me look hispanic. So the hair, the shirt and the socks made me look like I was from East LA and Mitch would make little comments such as, "Hey, Hector, pass me the wire cutters!" But in a very "Cheech-esque" voice. I must admit it was funny. So this particular day I ended up selling 3 accounts on one street in about an hour. That was easily the best I had ever done, so I joked with Mitch that I was going to grow my "playoff beard". "What?!" was his response. I went on to explain like how in baseball playoffs the players are very superstitious and often do things like wearing the same underwear multiple days in a row and not shaving in order to not curse the winning streak. So in the playoffs you see a lot of guys with beards because they won't shave until they lose or have a bad game or stop doing well whatever they are doing well. When I explained this to Mitch he of course laughed his head off. He then agreed that must grow my playoff beard in order to keep on with the success with the day. So i decided to not shave to keep the selling streak going.


After my post last week featuring the dirty 'stache, Mitch exhorted me to bring back the playoff beard. I decided that it was a good time and that I must grow it out in order to succeed this semester and graduate. As you can see from these pictures its absolutely disgusting. I should never attempt this. You know how sometimes you look at families and you think, "Some people should just not be allowed to pro-create."? Well i think when I was walking around the past week, people were thinking, "Some people should just not be allowed to grow facial hair." I really think that I should have driven around a old Chevy pickup and gone to some Monster Truck rally's. I also pose another question, why is crappy, thin facial hair synonymous with trashy people? Even white trash guy on The Simpsons has a thin mustache like mine.

You might be asking yourself, "What happened that fateful summer? Did you grow a beard? Were you successful the rest of the summer?" Well I don't remember exactly what happened first. Either I got sick of the beard being gross, disgusting, and itchy, and the sales subsequently stopped. Or the sales stopped and it gave me an excuse to shave the thing off. Regardless, I ended up coming home early because door-to-door summer sales sucks. And I also ended up shaving this week because I realized that gross facial hair is only funny for a few hours and then its just disgusting. Also, superstitions are for ignorant people. The end.

Stay tuned next for my next topic of discussion, "Where do people learn to drive?" Its going to be an exciting discourse.

Also please enjoy this song by Valient Thorr. They have awesome beards that I wish I could grow.

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